This gun photo caused some controversy on our website, for a few people who hadn’t heard this incredible story yet.
“A tree is recognized by its fruit.” – Mat 12:33.
A Disturbingly Beautiful Picture
The Reward and Fruitfulness of Suffering
I have received so many wonderful testimonies over the years, but perhaps none more touching than Kim John Curtis. Kim, a 70-year-old man at the time, was sitting in his RV so lonely and discouraged about his faith and life, that he found himself for the third time sitting with a gun pointed under his chin.
December 31st, 2016
My name is Kim John Curtis and I’m 70 yrs. old I was listening to one of your videos only because I opened the page by mistake, on YouTube. I was sitting here in my RV with a 357 magnum in my hand and aimed right under my chin. I am not sure what actually happened, but the gun went off and fell to the floor. I just sort of sat there wondering why my eyes were still open and why I could still hear your video. I couldn't figure out what went wrong, I'm a good shot, and at close range how could I miss?
Kim had been a professing Christian for 17 years. He had attended three different churches and had been kicked out of all three after questioning what he called the greasy grace teaching. He continues…
I gave up on God, Jesus, and reading the bible. I went back to my old lifestyle of booze, pot, cussing, but never cursed God. I didn't chase women, but I did pursue porno and masturbation. I had and still have an intense hatred of those people. After all they are Gods chosen righteous people, aren't they? I can't say that I hated God or Jesus, I just hated his chosen people.
It has taken me about four months to get to where I am now. Even 48 hrs. from Bang! Ooops.. Missed, I still hate them mostly because they have convinced me that I am evil, no good, and unsalvageable.
When I read his email, I knew the Lord was after Kim. I sent him a few personal recordings and then sent him the John 7:17 Challenge.
Kim started taking the Challenge and within just a few weeks, I received this beautiful and glorious email from the very man who had tried to end his life just five weeks earlier. God is to be praised!
February 10th 2017
Hi Mike, I am really grateful for the book. I thank the Lord that he has given you such a terrific insight. Things are improving and I am very sensitive to the Holy Spirit now. It is not an emotional high, it is more like coming up for air after diving deep in the ocean. You know like when you aren't sure you're going to make it to the surface. And then you burst through and gasp for air. Suddenly you know you are going to be OK and you just float there sucking in air and then you relax for a few heartbeats and then you start swimming for shore. This may sound silly but I find myself reading the Psalms and then Later in the day I just close my eyes and make up my own Psalms and it’s like I can feel the heart of David as he prayed, praised and sang his own Psalms. All I know is that I don't want to stop and I know that there is the presence of the Holy Spirit all around me. I feel, I guess the word is INVOLVED. Not the spectator sense you get when just listening to some preacher or even music. This is well almost indescribable. All I know is peace and security and a real appetite for the red letters!!!!!!
You show that you are a letter from Christ, the result of our ministry, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the Living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts. – 2 Cor 3:3
The following year, I sent Kim another email to check on him and ask Him if he was still clinging to the Lord. I received the following reply, not from Kim, but clearly from the HOLY SPIRIT who was now alive and well inside of Him. Hallelujah!
July 22nd 2017
YES !!!!. Things have changed for me so entirely that I can hardly keep up with them. I'm not getting rich or famous. I'm not getting younger and handsomer. I am getting free of my past and free to explore each day in the wonderment, the strength, and assurance that is in Jesus. I have been freed from the condemnation I have always felt because I knew religion but not JESUS. The Holy Spirit is reshaping my heart, my mind, and even my body. I am stronger and healthier. I have an insatiable hunger for truth that only found in prayer and worship or praise. A relationship with Jesus is NOT about US. It is about Jesus. Obedience, that is our obedience to His Word, is our true expression of love for Him and gratitude for what He has done for us. "If you love me you will obey me. If you keep my words and obey me, then truly you are MY disciples."
How? Feed the poor. Visit and care for the sick, entreat and care for the widows and orphaned. In other words, do what He did. Do His works. It's not "What would Jesus do; but what DID He do? I believe that this is how we demonstrate our LOVE for Jesus. Seek His face instead of His hand. Our blessing is a closer relationship with Him and eventually eternal life.
I want to thank you for all the work you have done, and your steadfast obedience to Jesus. Because of your obedience and work, I am walking in faith in what Jesus has done for me. I am on the road to eternal life. I now know Love, true love and I am able to share that love with others. There are so many others out there just like me and you have the ministry and vehicle to reach them. I don't know how many other hurting hearts and souls are out here that will receive your message, but if it is only just one like me, then you must keep going on. I believe in my heart of hearts that a crown awaits its place on your head. Please be welcome to my testimony and use it as you will. I love you in the Lord and I praise God that He brought me to your video on that day. It saved my Life and restored my soul.
YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-SHUAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Is Not the Suffering Worth it?
You may very well know about my many sufferings over the years, and you may be one who has been afraid of experiencing some of those, but how do you feel about the heavenly blessings and fruitfulness which have resulted from my suffering?
Just imagine how I might feel when I get to meet, in heaven, my brothers and sisters in Christ who were able to find Christ for the first time, or to hold on to Him just a little longer, because God used my ministry to bless them!
You truly cannot outgive God and the way I see it, all these years later, is that if you are not willing to suffer for Christ, you are not willing to be blessed by Christ.
“I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.” – John 12:24