40 – Carina - Guard Your Heart: Discernment in Relationships
“Carina had been married two previous times. She sent me a recording explaining to me what she believed were some “signs” and circumstances which seemed to indicated to her that she should move forward with a certain man, perhaps to be her future husband. I was very disturbed for her, when I heard her reasonings and I send her the following recording to plead with her to come to her senses. To the praise of God, she had ears to hear and took my counsel to heart.”
Guard Your Heart: Discernment in Relationships
Are you, like Carina, in today’s recording, seeking a life partner? It's a natural and beautiful desire, but one that requires careful discernment. The world often tells us to follow our hearts, but Jeremiah 17:9 (NIV84) warns us, “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” Feelings can be fleeting and deceptive, leading us down paths that are not God's best for us.
Instead of relying on emotions, we must bathe our decisions about relationships in prayer, seeking God's wisdom above all else. Proverbs 3:5-6 encourages us, "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” This means surrendering our desires to God, asking Him to guide us and reveal His will, regardless of how something looks for feels.
When considering a potential partner, it's essential to look beyond superficial qualities. Does this person share your intensity of faith? Do they demonstrate the fruits of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23)? Do they prioritize their relationship with Jesus Christ? These are the qualities that build a strong and lasting foundation for marriage.
Be wary of "open doors" and coincidences. While God can certainly work through these things, the devil can also use them to deceive us. He is a master of disguise and can make tempting situations appear as if they are God's will. He almost always comes in and offers us a shortcut to our “desires” or an alternative to God’s promises. (“turn the stone into bread”) 1 Peter 5:8 warns us, "Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”
Above all, prioritize your relationship with Jesus Christ. Seek Him first, make Him your magnificent obsession, and He will satisfy the deepest longings of your heart, whether you are single or married. For some there is wisdom in staying single, if it is the Lord’s will. As Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 7:32, "I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man or woman is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he or she can please the Lord.” A deep and abiding relationship with Jesus is the foundation for every other relationship in our lives. When we find our completeness in Him, we are then prepared to choose a partner wisely, according to God's perfect will. Lisa was God’s perfect will for me and for the last several years, we have both stood in amazement at His choice and the redemption we have both enjoyed in our marriage!
