God’s Whole Counsel on Divorce and Remarriage is much larger than just the three words, “God hates divorce”.

Import Biblical points many professing Christians remain ignorant of, regarding Divorce and Remarriage

  1. “I hate divorce” (Mal 2:16) is not God’s full counsel on the subject of divorce, any more than John 3:16 is God’s full counsel on salvation.

  2. Marriage’s first purpose was for the blessing of man and woman to not suffer that which God said was not good, to be alone and without help and companionship in this life. Procreation was secondary, not primary. Even King Solomon, by the Spirit, recognized the importance of having someone by your side “two are better than one”. Gen 2:18, Ecc 4:9-12. Even the apostles brought along believing wives. (1 Cor 9:5)

  3. Marriage is a temporary earthly institution, NOT the savior of the church or the world, which so many seem to have made it out to be. Marriage does not even exist in heaven. Therefore we can never correctly conclude that this temporary institution is more important to God than the eternal soul and spiritual health of its members, especially if that union threatens the spiritual welfare of one or both souls. (Mat 22:30)

  4. Not all marriage/divorce/remarriage situations are the same and it so foolish to judge what you cannot see or do not know about someone else’s situation. Take Michal, Daughter of King Saul. She marries David (1 Sam 18:7, but then David has to flee from Saul. Saul then gives Michal (David’s wife) in REMARRIAGE to Paltiel 1 Sam 25:44, but then later King David has her taken from her husband Paltiel, who loves her so much that he cries all the way following behind the cart she is taken back to David in, so she can be David’s wife again. (2 Sam 3:14). How does this situation fit nicely into your doctrines on divorce, remarriage, etc?

  5. Not all marriages/relationships are put together by God, anymore than all “Christian” businesses or ministries are started by God. (Joshua 23:12-13, Ezra Ch. 9:13-14, & 10:2-3, 10-13)...not to mention “Abraham and Hagar, David and Bathsheba, or the relationship between Samson and Delilah”

  6. We are in those terrible days of counterfeit Christianity, where multiplied millions are yoked to a spouse who professes faith in Christ which is not a true saving faith, and who believes in a Jesus which is not the true Christ. (2 Cor 11:3-5)

  7. As a result there are millions of unequally yoked marriages which God Hates even more than the divorce which would rectify that.  (Exodus 34:14,16, Deut 7:3-4, Deut 13:6-10, 1 Kings 11:1-4)

  8. The huge number of divorces which God commanded in Ezra 9 & 10 affected every tribe in the remnant of Israel left at that time, even the Levites (Ezra 9:1). If God did not allow them to ever remarry after He commanded them to divorce, where did all the Jewish people come from today, since it says all of Israel was guilty of these inter-marriages and thus called to divorce their wives and put away their children? Where did all the future children and population of Israel come from?

  9. Jesus Christ is the same, yesterday, today, and forever so He still feels this same way about any marriage partner dragging one of his beloved sheep into the darkness or into disobedience or apostasy (Heb 13:8)

  10. This also means that God STILL commands us to separate from the disobedient and wicked,...Ps 1:1, 26:5, Psa 101:4, 7-8, 119:113, 115, 118, Pro 13:20, 19:19, 22:10, 22:24-25, 23:9, Mat 7:6, 10:34-38, 18:17, Mark 3:25, 8:22, 10:14, 12:30, Rom 1:32, Rom 16:17, 1 Cor 5:11-12, 1 Cor 15:33, 2 Cor 6:14-17, Eph 5:3-7, 5:11-14, 2 Tim 3:1-5, Tit 3:10-11, Heb 1:8-9, 1 Tim 5:22, 2 John 1:11, Rev 18:4)

  11. NONE of the above commands are abolished by the temporary institution called “marriage” except when an unbelieving spouse is “willing” to live with the believing spouse in “peace” as clearly taught in 1 Cor 7:12-15. Examples: “Beating your spouse emotionally, verbally or physically, or spending your families money on porno, or antagonizing your believing spouse while they try to read the Bible or pray, or trying to prevent them from their normal Christian duties, are NOT examples of an unbelieving spouse being “willing to live in peace with the believing spouse”, therefore divorce may indeed be a Biblical option according to Paul, where he teaches (1 Cor 7:12) that the condition for “not divorcing” is if the unbelieving spouse is “willing” to live peacefully (v.15) with the believing spouse.

  12. Jesus’ teaching on divorce was specifically to a Jewish audience. Just as each of His messages to the 7 churches in Revelation 2-3 were specific to each church, in accordance to their unique issues and sins, so too was His teaching in the Gospels on divorce specific to Jews who were in a divorce crisis, divorcing for any foolish reason (ie. burnt meals), because their hearts were hard. (Matthew 19:8)

  13. Even still, Jesus did not fail to give a concession of remarriage to those Jews who were quick to divorce, saying, “Except for Adultery” in Matthew 19:9

  14. Even the Westminster Confession of Faith acknowledges divorce and remarriage are permissible after adultery or abandonment. In August 1643, the Assembly, which acted with the full authority of Parliament in religious matters,[11] allowed for divorce in the Confession of Faith ('Of Marriage and Divorce,' Chapter 24, Section 5) in cases of infidelity or abandonment. The Westminster Confession of Faith states: 'Adultery or fornication, committed after a contract, being detected before marriage, giveth just occasion to the innocent party to dissolve that contract. In the case of adultery after marriage, it is lawful for the innocent party to sue out a divorce, and after the divorce to marry another, as if the offending party were dead.'

  15. Jesus intentionally chose a woman who was divorced and remarried FIVE times to first publicly announce He was the Messiah and then used her to evangelize an entire town. Never once did he say to her, “God Hates divorce, or you can never marry again, or you are going to hell because you remarried five times!” (John 4:1-25)

  16. The same principle used in 1 Corinthians 7:39 to describe the widow who is no longer “bound” to her dead husband, and thus free to remarry, is the same principle used in the phrase “no longer bound” in 1 Corinthians 7:15, to describe the new condition of the believing spouse who has been left by a believing spouse. They too are free to remarry...even the Puritans understood this. Anyone believing that God wants to keep under bondage and punish the believing spouse has entirely missed the heart and soul of God’s love and purpose in the New Covenant. For God to do this completely contradicts His love to the Saint and His entire book and history of freeing people from bondage, not keeping them in it. (2 Cor 3:17) Especially see John Gill’s commentary below on 1 Cor 7:15

  17. The greater principle in the NEW Covenant than “physical death” which can separate a marriage is “spiritual death”. The legalists who quote Rom 7:2, “a married woman is ‘bound’ to her husband as long as he is alive” fail to read v. 4 “so my brothers you also died to the law” and they fail to see that no one has ever physically died to the Law that they might be united to Christ...no one! Welcome to the NEW covenant! When you died to the law, you did not die a physical death, but rather a spiritual death! Many people are indeed in marriages living with spiritually dead spouses who have once and for all rejected Christ and that death is slowly spreading to the living spouse, which is exactly why God gave all the commands to separate from the disobedient.  He is trying to preserve a Holy uncontaminated remnant. This cannot be done when a person is living with a dead body yoking their light to the darkness. You cannot be yoked to Christ and a dead person or a child of Satan at the same time. Again, see 2 Cor 6:14-17 and then try to add the words to your Bible, “except if you are married”.

  18. Passages showing spiritual death in New Covenant: (Mat 8:22, 23:27, John 5:24, 6:63, 12:40, Rom 7:10, 8:2, 8:6, Eph 2:1, 2:5, Col 2:13, Jam 1:15, 2:26, 1 Timothy 5:6, Rev 3:1). How we love to quote, “Man looks on the outside, but God on the inside.” And yet the religious mind misses how much that exact truth applies to this New Cov principle of physical death (outside), vs spiritual death (inside).

  19. Regarding the sanctification of the unbelieving spouse in 1 Cor 7:14. First, this does NOT mean they are saved. It means they are not considered unclean so that the believing spouse is not unclean, and neither are the children, in God’s sight, for being yoked to them. This clause is ONLY for spouses living “peacefully” with the believing spouse (1 Cor 7:15), not someone who lives wickedly, or who is a child of the devil according to 1 John 3:6-10

  20. Anyone who has doubts about divorce or remarriage should NOT move forward in either, until you have heard clearly from the Lord, and can move forward by faith in a clear conscience. Anything not done in faith (with doubt) is sin. Romans 14:23

  21. Only God, by His Holy Spirit can give Revelation on the deep things and matters of His heart on subjects like this. God reveals them to babes but hides them from the clever, the proud, the legalistic and the “wise and learned”. Matthew 11:25-26

For a more in-depth teaching on this subject, you may download for free short PDF book called “God Hates Divorce But He Hates Some Marriages Even More” at the following link.

John Gill’s commentary on remarriage after being left by an unbeliever.

1 Cor 7:15

But if the unbelieving depart,.... If the unbelieving party, man or woman, separate themselves from the believing party on account of religion, and in hatred to it, and will not live with the believer unless Christ is denied, his Gospel abjured, and his ordinances and worship relinquished:

let him depart; he or she, though not without making use of all proper means to retain them; but if, after all, they will go, unless such things are complied with as are unreasonable and sinful, they are not to be held, but let go; and the deserted person may sit down contented, being not to be blamed, the fault entirely lying upon the deserter:

a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. The Ethiopic version reads it, "to such an one"; one that is called by grace a church member, and so a brother or sister in Christ, is not to be subject to an unbeliever in matters of conscience, in things appertaining to the worship of God, and the service and glory of Christ; nor, being in such circumstances, that either Christ must be forsaken, or the unbeliever will depart, are they obliged to yield to such an one, but rather suffer a departure; nor are they bound to remain unmarried, but are free to marry another person, after all proper methods have been tried for a reconciliation, and that appears to be impracticable; desertion in such a case, and attended with such circumstances, is a breach of the marriage contract, and a dissolution of the bond, and the deserted person may lawfully marry again; otherwise a brother, or a sister in such a case, would be in subjection and bondage to such a person:

The same foul demonic spirit that tries to keep people in bondage to a child of the devil, or in bondage to loneliness, is the same exact foul spirit that Paul warned Timothy about when He said...“they forbid them to marry”.  1 Timothy 4:1-3 NIV

[1] The Spirit clearly says that in later times some will abandon the faith and follow deceiving spirits and things taught by demons. [2] Such teachings come through hypocritical liars, whose consciences have been seared as with a hot iron. [3] They forbid people to marry and order them to abstain from certain foods, which God created to be received with thanksgiving by those who believe and who know the truth.

YOUTUBE REMARRIAGE REPLY

For those of you who are personally struggling with this issue yourselves...take heart!  The Puritans understood this provision and freedom from God so clearly, just as any child would.  It is only confused men like John Piper (Who admitted that he had so much divorce and remarriage in their church that they had no idea what to do about it or what Biblical position to actually stand on) and the late David Pawson who brought such terrible confusion to this issue for millions. I believe they were right in recognizing the crisis in marriage, but the problem is not corrected when you lean entirely on only one side of God’s counsel on the subject. Not only that, but I have said many times over the years, the problems are not in the marriage. The problems are in the sinners in the marriage, the half-hearted, ignorant, carnality that exists so prevelantly among the masses that call themselves a Christian. The problem that Piper and Pawson were seeing was only the rotten fruit, not the rotten root. The root issue is the masses of false converts, who have a counterfeit Christian faith and/or a different Jesus (2 Cor 11:3-4).  

However, long before Piper and Pawson brought their own words and conjectures (because the Scriptures alone are so clear on this that even a child can understand it… It is only the wise and learned who lean on their own understanding in the face of a crisis, who confuse these issues in the heart of God) bringing the subject into such confusion...there was crystal clarity on this issue of divorce and remarriage after infidelity or abandonment, in the early church.  What a tragedy these men have not understood the clear principle of “spiritual death” as the Puritans understood it.  Spiritual death in New Cov: (Mat 8:22, 23:27, John 5:24, 6:63, 12:40, Rom 7:10, 8:2, 8:6, Eph 2:1, 2:5, Col 2:13, Jam 1:15, 2:26, 1 Timothy 5:6, Rev 3:1)

Also, how tragic that when they read Romans 7:2 of the woman who is bound to the law of marriage and only freed upon the death of her husband, cannot see that while that law is true, it DOES NOT EXCLUDE adultery or abandonment clauses (Mat 19:9, 1 Cor 7:15).  Also, how tragic that they have NOT even understood that Romans 7:4 completely contradicts their physical death hypothesis because no one in the history of creation has ever died a PHYSICAL death to the law as suggested in 7:4. It is a spiritual death, not a physical death that freed us from the law of Moses so that we might be married to another...Christ!  How tragic men cannot see this and thus they are purveyors of the Letter which KILLETH rather than the Spirit which gives life and liberty!  (2 Cor 3:6...2 Cor 3:17)

Even the Westminster Confession of Faith acknowledges divorce and remarriage are permissible after adultery or abandonment.  In August 1643, the Assembly, which acted with the full authority of Parliament in religious matters,[11] allowed for divorce in the Confession of Faith ('Of Marriage and Divorce,' Chapter 24, Section 5) in cases of infidelity or abandonment. The Westminster Confession of Faith states: 'Adultery or fornication, committed after a contract, being detected before marriage, giveth just occasion to the innocent party to dissolve that contract. In the case of adultery after marriage, it is lawful for the innocent party to sue out a divorce, and after the divorce to marry another, as if the offending party were dead.'

If anyone has ears to hear, let him hear. - Jesus Christ