Series / Walking With God into the Impossible

Greetings in Christ brothers and sisters!

This teaching series, and The Apostate Bride of Christ, are no longer available at this time, for very blessed reasons. God gave Persis and I another last minute deliverance, only this time it was in our marriage. His deliverance was in spite of the fact that my faith essentially failed while waiting for His promise to deliver us. I now join, in humility, the long list of believers who the Lord has had to say, “Oh you of little faith, why did you doubt?”

In spite of my faith failure, where I pretty much gave up on my wife’s love and our marriage, the Lord was still so gracious to grant an incredible last minute reconciliation, complete with peace, understanding, and sacrificial love on both of our parts. The day we reconciled became perhaps the most remarkable day and moment of my life because of how it happened. God once again showed His astonishing grace!

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”

— EPHESIANS 5:25

As a god fearing man, whom loves Christ, I am to give up myself for my wife, whom I love dearly. One of the many ways I can give myself up for her, is to respect her right to privacy in her own life, regardless of my being in a public ministry. I have come to have greater understanding and respect for our relationship in this way, realizing that it should be considered sacred between she and I alone, until and unless God directs our hearts otherwise.

The Lord has called me, for a long season, to lay down my life and share it publicly and to be highly transparent about it. This is a unique calling, which God does not give to all others. When Persis and I were married, I made the very incorrect assumption that Persis had the same calling and grace in this area that I was given.

Going forward, until and unless God wills otherwise, my relationship with Persis will remain sacred and I am excited about that! That is not the only part of my life which will become sacred. During this time of reflection on our relationship, I began feeling the Lord move me to bring a close to my ministry of transparency, altogether.

Once I finish the series, “Trusting God in the Wilderness”, I believe the sharing of the intimate details of my life will be over. It has has had a good purpose for a season, but all seasons come to an end. I am looking forward to teaching straight from the Bible and getting myself and my stories out of the way! I laid my life down for others to walk on and to find God’s guidance and direction in, but now it is time to “take my life back up again.”

The reason my Father loves me is that I lay down my life—only to take it up again.
— John 10:17

For the first time in my ministry, I am able to respect and better understand why great men of God, like A.W. Tozer, Andrew Murray, and T. Austin Sparks, spoke so rarely, if ever about their own lives. I am excited about the rest of my life, how ever much time the Lord gives me, becoming sacred, a mystery known only to God and Persis. Being transparent has had its blessings, but it also has had many drawbacks, one of which was drawing attention to and creating dependence upon the servant, rather than the Master. I want all the focus to be on Him, not on me! It is He who has worked in me to give me this desire and to act according to His purpose (Phi 2:13) and He has used this season with my wife to create this awareness and understanding in me. What a Romans 8:28 God we have!

I have much work to finish with the Wilderness series, but I am really looking forward to the next season of ministry, should Father grant it. I would very much enjoy teaching straight out of the Bible, like I’ve done a few times in the past. May it be in Jesus’ name!

Nevertheless, the most important thing right now, is that the Lord has blessed Persis and I to stay together and to continue to love each other. Thank you Lord God Almighty! I gave her back to God and proved that I loved Him more than I did her, but I’m so happy that Father gave her back to me. She is still the most adorable person I have ever met in my life. Just looking at her brings a smile to my face. Although, at this time, we still do not share the same exact faith in Christ, we do share the same exact heart and sacrificial love for each other, and we both know that God brought us together and neither of us want to separate from one another anymore.

“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one, Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”

— MATTHEW 19:4-6

“To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? ”

— 1 CORINTHIANS 7:12-16