2013 January - Michael Chriswell Journal Entries

Part 1

  • The frustrations with my mother continue

  • It is better to ice cold or fiery hot than lukewarm

  • After much prayer I see more 212's and 1101 regarding the woman I believe God is to give me as my wife

  • She accepts my friend request on Facebook

  • Small TV stations asks to play my story on TV late at night

  • Police officer gives me grace after a rolling stop at a Stop sign

  • The desire to teach against Once Saved Always Saved

  • A summary of providential events so far with the "woman"

Part 2

  • My faith is being tried and tested regarding a future wife and my finances and fruit in the ministry

  • God is building up my faith muscle by making me wait

  • Choosing to walk by faith and not by sight

  • God teaching me faith is being sure of what I hope for and certain of what I do not see

  • Praying for financial support everyday

  • Seeing a hurting woman in church and wanting to share the story with her

  • Confirmation about the 212 woman and her faith in Christ

  • How I end up being right even though I was often wrong

  • The revelation that I'll be with my children in heaven forever, not matter how much time we miss here

  • The question I would ask lukewarm Christians

Part 3

  • God tells me to confront mom on something inappropriate because she is calling herself a Christian

  • Confronting my mother about her salvation and going to hell

  • Satan blinds the eyes of unbelievers

  • Thoughts on living a life of faith and fear

  • Persevering in humble circumstances

  • Getting in God's love vs. Remaining in God's love

  • George Muller Faith with NO Money but God will provide

  • 666 warning followed by another legal letter.

  • My creepiest encounter with a demon yet after a terrible dream about my ex-wife

  • Struggling to wait for my promise of a wife

  • Mom's bondage to fear

  • More render problems for new version of video leaves me very frustrated

  • By God's providence I run into the "woman" again

  • When God becomes our greater desire, our lesser desires die

Part 4

  • Setting down my "tent making" business to focus entirely on the ministry work

  • Praying about my future wife, God shows me "Finish the work"

  • Hit with huge amounts of doubt and begging God to not let me be left as a fool

  • Asking God what He wants me to teach others in my ministry?

  • God severely trying my faith in the area of finances

  • Revelations on prayer and how it has changed in my life

  • I am having faith in God, not faith in faith

  • I am either the biggest fool I know or the most blessed I know

  • Increased parental alienation from my ex-wife

Part 5

  • Surrounding by 777's at the Fort Lauderdale Cruise Terminal before court hearing

  • Explaining how my faith is being influenced by Charismatic Madness

  • Struggling with re-editing and telling my story

  • Praying for God to give my custody of my children

  • A terrible ankle injury and how God used it

2019 Copyright Notice. While these recordings in the series “Trusting God in the Wilderness” may be downloaded for personal use on your own device, they are not to be copied, transmitted, edited, publicly played, shared, or uploaded to any website, social media platform, or content distribution systems such as YouTube. All other use of these recordings, without prior written permission, is strictly prohibited and all rights have been reserved by Michael Chriswell, owner of said recordings.

2012 December - Michael Chriswell Journal Entries

Part 1

  • Summary update

  • Feeling compassion for my ex-wife's attorney after all the attack

  • My Achilles heel is false accusation but God has strengthened me

  • Recalling some of the wonderful ways God has changed me

  • The Christian life is so much more simple than I ever understood

  • A simple illustration of what it means to Surrender to God

  • It's incredibly difficult to be a true Christian in America

  • Very detailed dream about meeting the "woman" then see 212 right after praying for a wife

  • The beginning on an epic spiritual battle trying to prevent me from rendering my story Trusting God in the Storm

  • The day of small beginnings in my ministry as the story is finished

  • God has made me poor so that others may become rich

  • It irony of truly having nothing, yet possessing everything

Part 2

  • Reflections on the soon launch of my story video

  • Praying fervently for God to open my mom's eyes

  • Reflecting on the financial disasters I made because I tried to save myself

  • Seeing never before seen spiritual attack against my producing this story

  • Very indignant over my mother's obstinate unbelief

  • God is arranging my circumstances and holding so many things back

  • God showing me 811 and telling me to finish the work

  • Prayer for large impact of the story before it launches

  • Believing that 1 million people will watch the story video

  • Satan bringing all kinds of flaming arrows of doubt about my story

Part 3

  • A terribly frustrating call with my old boss from the motivational speaking business

  • Satan tempts me with a very exotic looking woman at Starbucks

  • God shows me John 7:17 again

  • God uses the story to save someone from a second suicide attempt on the day of launch

  • A prophet has no honor in his own home or town: disappointing results from friends and family watching the story

  • Do not despise the day of small beginnings

  • God teaching me to ask specifically for what I want

  • Satan comes with his biggest sexual temptation yet

  • My children are being told I'm the devil by their grandfather

  • My children will have a real life example of New Testament Faith in my life through these recordings

Part 4

  • Feeling compassion for my ex-wife and her mother and father regardless of what they have done to me

  • Revelation and illustration about spiritual blindness

  • Seeing 7:11 and 11:11 so much, regarding my desire for a helpmate

  • God warns me about the Exotic Egyptian woman with 727

  • God shows me 212 three times regarding the "woman" I'm interested in

  • The need to persist in prayer

  • Realizing God no longer showing me certain numbers anymore because I don't need them

  • Laughing at what God says to the angels about me in heaven

  • Feeling tired, worn out, and needy. Asking Father to refresh my spirit

  • God shows me 747 and shows me he wants me to teach this to others Luke 7:47

  • The Spiritual 411 for finding God's guidance

  • Anxious to "get out there" and start helping people, but Lord is telling me to wait

  • Revelations about the problems others are facing that prevent them from knowing God

2019 Copyright Notice. While these recordings in the series “Trusting God in the Wilderness” may be downloaded for personal use on your own device, they are not to be copied, transmitted, edited, publicly played, shared, or uploaded to any website, social media platform, or content distribution systems such as YouTube. All other use of these recordings, without prior written permission, is strictly prohibited and all rights have been reserved by Michael Chriswell, owner of said recordings.

2012 November - Michael Journal Entries

Part 1

  • Indignation about the worldliness all around me at Starbucks

  • More threats and harrassment coming from my ex-wife's legal team

  • Tired of hearing about myself in producing the story Trusting God in the Storm

  • Realizing I cannot go long at all anymore without prayer and Bible time

  • I have yet to meet a successful Christian business man where I could see that Jesus Christ was the true love of their life.

  • Legal assaults just keep coming even after we are divorced

  • The 666's show how much of a spiritual battle we are in

  • The enemy wants us to react to the evil he does to us through others

  • Handling spiritual conflict from my mother

  • If you are not being persecuted your relationship with Jesus is likely off

  • God's voice can sustain you in any storm

Part 2

  • Asking for God's wisdom in conflicts with mom

  • The first time Father taught me about John 7:17

  • You can only know the truth that will set you free by obedience

  • Counseling and encouraging a friend that his depression may be spiritual and not physical

  • Mom not understanding my faith in God regarding finances and causes conflict

  • Ex-wife increasing parental alienation restricting my phone access to them more and more

  • The running accident which left me with a terrible ankle injury

  • Confirmation from friends that I'm on the right path

  • Learning to be still before my accusers and trusting God alone

  • How much do I share with the children about their mom's evil choices towards me?

  • Chelsea reading Psalm 103 with me, at eight years of age

  • Dropping children off in FL and seeing such religious hypocrisy in my ex-wife that it is shocking

  • How I'm dealing with the oppression of my mother's false god, her material possessions

  • Another example of how the Lord speaks to me (222)

  • Recognizing the worldly spirit behind most music and the impact it has on us as Christians

  • Believing I'm good enough, in Father's eyes, for a Kari Jobe type wife

  • God challenging me to believe Him for His best in a wife

  • Realizing my relationship vulnerabilities after being thrown away by my first wife

Part 3

  • God gives me revelation on Matthew 7:11

  • My message pleading with mega-church pastor Isaac Hunter to humble himself before God in his sin

  • God reminds me to preach the message of obedience

  • The need for a special place for prayer

  • Expressing the desires of my heart for my future wife

  • God teaching me to ask, seek, knock

2019 Copyright Notice. While these recordings in the series “Trusting God in the Wilderness” may be downloaded for personal use on your own device, they are not to be copied, transmitted, edited, publicly played, shared, or uploaded to any website, social media platform, or content distribution systems such as YouTube. All other use of these recordings, without prior written permission, is strictly prohibited and all rights have been reserved by Michael Chriswell, owner of said recordings.

2012 October - Michael Journal Entries

Part 1

  • Revelation that our stories are the hooks that God uses to fish for men

  • God uses Numbers 9:19 and Isaiah 50:10-11 to tell me to stay put regarding a "woman" and to obey Him and finish the work

  • Ex-wife's attorney files a new hearing for "Clarification of the Final Judgment" to try to turn around the victory God gave

  • Revelation that some people really are victims contrary to what motivational speaking teaches

  • The need to get people to run to God, not to men

  • Matthew 5:39 response to more parental alienation

  • Trusting that God sees all the wrongs done to you by others

  • My soul is beginning to relish in uncertainty because I trust God

  • The first time the Spirit gives me utterance for a stranger in prayer

  • Being accused of another health issue against my children form my ex

  • Being more thankful for my "thorn in the flesh" (my ex-wife)

Part 2

  • Parental alienation increasing and God tells me not to resist

  • Freedom and miracles follow forgiveness

  • God calling me to be bold and courageous to speak the hard truth

  • A respected friend tries to guide me in a direction different from what God has told me

  • God is making my road more and more narrow

  • Running into my ex-wife and realizing how thankful I am that God freed me from her

  • Teaching my friend Gustavo about 11:11 for his relationship

  • Sharing the Gospel in Starbucks

  • Feeling spiritual darkness in Orlando and how the world is trying to get me to cool off for Christ

  • God defines "good" gifts differently than we do

  • Thoughts about a friend struggling with pornography

  • Confronting a friend of mine who is still chasing "Ideas"

Part 3

  • Important revelations about how I believe my story proves God

  • The American Dream comes from Satan, NOT God

  • The huge importance of doing, not just hearing

  • What if you walked away from everything for Christ?

  • God opens a tightly closed door for me to see the children

  • A conversation with a friend about needing Jesus in the heart

  • A wonderfully blessed visit with my children

Part 4

  • Who was Norma Grey and why she was so special to me

  • Norma’s beautiful prayer for my future wife

  • Wanting people to know that I'm a very normal person and not special

  • Feel darkness and confusion about my what God is telling me

  • God uses 10:10 to lead me to John 10:10 letting me know I'm under attack

  • The battles make me totally dependent on Him which I am learning to love so much

  • The deeper meaning and blessing of John 10:10

  • His strength is becoming perfect in my weakness

  • I don't deserve this kind of help and guidance from the Lord

  • Having anxiety after seeing 222 10 times in one day and then the reason why

  • Seeing lots of 666's and then ex-wife tries to schedule hearings after I've left town

  • Divine encounter with friend about John Eldredge highlighting spiritual warfare in my story

  • Praying for a car and finances so I can do full-time ministry

Part 5

  • I get a phone call from my ex-wife's boss finally vindicating me after several years

2019 Copyright Notice. While these recordings in the series “Trusting God in the Wilderness” may be downloaded for personal use on your own device, they are not to be copied, transmitted, edited, publicly played, shared, or uploaded to any website, social media platform, or content distribution systems such as YouTube. All other use of these recordings, without prior written permission, is strictly prohibited and all rights have been reserved by Michael Chriswell, owner of said recordings.

2012 September - Michael Journal Entries

Part 1

  • Feeling anxiety about finances and possibly going to jail

  • Finding myself smitten by a woman sitting right behind me

  • Telling my mom what it feels like to be totally free from the world and all its desires

  • Calling our worldly loves (ie. sports) what God calls them (idols)

  • The true Jesus gets in the way of yours and other's lives

  • Trying to mix oil and water is exhausting and futile

  • We do not trust God enough to obey Him, but it’s the secret of the deeper Christian life

  • Some of the marks of a person who knows God

  • Asking God to show you the barriers to Him that you cannot see

  • The need to be persistent in finding God

Part 2

  • God using devotionals in a new way to train me and guide me

  • How I mistook my own imagination for the voice of God

  • How so many Christians get into disaster through compromise with someone they believe God will change if they just pray hard enough

  • Desiring God so much that I begin to open myself up to Charismatic madness and deception

Part 3

  • Focus on Christ, not on the Family

  • Personal revival is the key to community revival

  • What is so wrong with "Christian" counseling

  • Jesus never said come to me and I'll heal you. He said come to me and I'll crucify you

  • How is it that some people in 3rd world countries who have gone through worse suffering than us still have joy-filled lives in Christ without counseling

  • Seeing an sobering truth in the life of Championship athletes

  • Jesus is the only One who hasn't failed me

  • Spinning our wheels searching for successful techniques and the “life hacks” of men

  • God is teaching me the importance of obedience and finding true joy in it

  • God will not take you out of the uncomfortable situation you are in until you become comfortable in it

  • God bringing relief between mom and I

Part 4

  • Obedience must follow love, not the other way around

  • Why we lose the "Honeymoon with Jesus" feeling

  • Helping people to save time by avoiding "rabbit trails"

  • The shortest route to God making his "home" with you

  • We can't claim the promises of God without walking in obedience to God

  • I'm talking to you about a different Jesus Christ than you have likely heard about

Part 5

  • The hard teachings of Jesus are designed to blow out the half-hearted fans of his

  • How we can remain in the love of God

  • Renewing and strengthening my faith in the area of my finances

  • Signing up to be a fool for Christ in the eyes of others

  • Flaming arrows of doubts about telling my story

  • God is strengthening my faith through darkness

  • God teaching me not to manipulate people or circumstances to get my financial needs met, but trust only in Him

  • More validation that I'm doing what God has called me to do

  • God is staying silent in order to build my faith

  • Righteous indignation towards the darkness and idolatry in the world

  • Nothing brings me closer to God than prayer

Part 6

  • Computer crashes just as I'm gaining momentum on producing my story video

  • Prayer thanking God for the freedom in Christ I've longed for and for revival through my story and ministry

  • God is asking us to trade up, rather than just give up

  • Everything is backwards in the Christian faith from our natural life

  • Why all the suffering in my life is proof of God

  • Becoming the brother in humble circumstances who can take pride in his high position

Part 7

  • The greatest thing in the world to me now is the un-explainable presence of the Lord

  • People reject Christ because they have incorrectly pre-judged Him

  • How I felt receiving my final divorce papers

  • Do not judge my God by my circumstances, but by my heart

  • The Revelation of my 777 day divorce

  • How Satan used my mom's fear to attack me and try to flip me over in my faith

  • When God said, "No" idea for a part of my book

Part 8

  • My Miraculous Divorce Deliverance

Part 9

  • A story for my friend who is trapped in pornography

  • Enemy attacks me with terrifying thoughts about my ex-wife and my children

  • A very powerful prayer for my ministry and those who will be touched by it

  • God promises me that many will hear the new song He put in my mouth and what God has done in my life and put their trust in Him

  • Hidden consequences of disobedience and important lessons on repentance

  • My burning desire to see more people know Jesus

  • The night I met a beautiful woman whom I was smitten by

Part 10

  • Military power vs God's power

  • Reflections on the terrifying arrows being shot into my heart about my ex-wife hurting the children

  • Being surprised that Satanic attacks come so quickly after a miraculous deliverance of God

  • Revelations about why I've grown more outside the "church" than I ever did in the "church"

  • Christ said, "Abide in me, not in the "church"

  • Revelation on how our music choice reflects our heart

  • A terrible temptation to look back to my old life and ways in order to win over a woman as a man who provides

Part 11

  • Tempted by an attractive woman the night after I met "the woman" I'm waiting to have coffee with

  • The Amazing revelation on what God was trying to tell me with 11:11

  • God will not give us what He has new for us, until we let go of the old

  • God corrects me from being creative (crafty) in telling my story

  • Giving my anxiousness about my future wife over to the Lord in prayer

  • More prayer for fruitfulness in the ministry

Part 12

  • Will my coffee date with my "blue moon" woman happen?

  • Struggling to understand my friends' slavery to sin

  • Disappointed that I still have not heard back from that "woman"

  • I made a major mistake with the "woman" by my anxiousness

  • God shows me Hebrews 4:14 after my failure

  • Father confirms my call into ministry with Isaiah 61:6

  • Realizing that exploring a relationship with a woman right now would be a serious distraction to my work

  • God confirms for me to finish the work with 2 Corinthians 8:11

  • Satan is now using women to try to distract me more and more

  • Separate from the darkness all around you in people

2019 Copyright Notice. While these recordings in the series “Trusting God in the Wilderness” may be downloaded for personal use on your own device, they are not to be copied, transmitted, edited, publicly played, shared, or uploaded to any website, social media platform, or content distribution systems such as YouTube. All other use of these recordings, without prior written permission, is strictly prohibited and all rights have been reserved by Michael Chriswell, owner of said recordings.

2012 August - Michael Journal Entries

Part 1

  • Being afflicted in everyway and glorying in my suffering

  • My mom and I's biggest confrontation ever!

  • God giving me supernatural guidance and comfort in my pain

  • Father is breaking me of all my self-sufficiency

  • Outside pressure to get me to disobey God

  • All income doors are being closed before me

  • Realizing suffering that roots out SELF takes years, not months

  • So confused about my work situation and what looks like idleness in my life

Part 2

  • God uses my son Tyler to give me divine guidance

  • Conflict with my former business partner and best friend

  • Measuring an accusation against the fruit in the person's life who presents the accusation

  • An eye opening moment contrasting my old life (worldly success) with my new life (spiritual success)

  • Realizing I can no longer pray the Old Covenant curses on my enemies as David did

  • Still missing my ex-girlfriend and praying for her

  • Drop the children for what will be the last summer visit with them ever

  • So thankful for the compassion that the Lord has given me for my #1 enemy

  • The Lord tests me by connecting me with "successful" people from my old life

  • A divine encounter with an old friend who is working for Reinhard Bonnke

  • Sensing spiritual attack and receive 2 Thessalonians 3:3

  • God training me to pray in faith, to believe I have received what I have asked

  • God confirms He's been showing me Revelation 2:2 with the number 202

Part 3

  • A story about what God wants me to do in the next court hearing

  • A story of how God used a friend of mine to reveal to me that I have a very specific purpose

  • A surprise reunion with my children at their school and a test of my new heart before my enemy

  • Negative call with my children. Satan's attacks on them are working

  • Being spiritually attacked repeatedly at 3:00 am in the morning and in my dreams

  • The truth about binding and loosing Satan

  • An open door with the production department at Christ for All Nations (Reinhard Bonnke)

Part 4

  • Insights after my meeting at Reinhard Bonnke's CFAN Ministry Headquarters

  • God speaks to my heart while standing behind a large production camera in their studio

  • Huge inspiration from Bonnke's book to live a life of faith

  • Making a determined decision to trust God in my life of faith from this point forward

  • It is too easy to not trust in God living in the United States

  • Scuba diving: The deeper Christian Life Metaphor

  • My ministry message: To Him Who Desires Me, He Will Find Me

  • My attitude should be a reflection of God and the certainty of His Truth

  • God shows me dozens of times the number 404 and then shows me my ultimate purpose in ministry

  • A vision of me pleading with people to believe God loves them

  • Revelations on the old Michael Chriswell vs. New Michael Chriswell, as it relates to walking with God

Part 5 (NOT FOR CHILDREN OR THE EASILY OFFENDED)

  • God will rarely force His way into someone's life. Paul may be an exception

  • The Lord asks me to set down masturbation and a certain music I've been listening to

  • Still not feeling released from my ex-girlfriend and hoping God will change her heart

  • Faith only works when we ask according to God's will

  • My current thoughts about Reinhard Bonnke

  • New insights on knowing God internally

  • Suffering makes God's promises real

  • God telling me to stand firm regarding seeking justice from the Magistrate in the divorce

  • Impossible obstacles rise in the divorce situation

Part 6

  • Let us never talk about God as if He's not here

  • Planning for my ministry

  • More fervent prayer for God to turn my ex-girlfriend's heart to Him

  • Feeling a dread to go back home to my parent's house

  • Feeling a new calm towards my mother that I've not previously felt

  • God begins to make me so sensitive to the hurting around me and the lost

  • Sensing my ministry has a spirit of reconciliation to those who once knew, but have drifted away or gone cold

  • God uses a divine encounter with the band Unknown Lyric to confirm my purpose in Job 4:4

  • Divine encounter with a man named Bobby Junkin

  • Friend gives me a false prophecy about my ex-girlfriend

Part 7

  • Summary of divorce injustice so far and having strong faith that justice will finally come

  • Confirmation that my story is my ministry

  • Enrolled in the school of faith

  • All I need is the presence of God

  • The inside out approach to knowing God

  • I am completely obsessed with God

Part 8

  • God bringing more people to me that I can help

  • My mom and Satan are trying to scare me into believing I'm going to jail

  • Effortless boldness and fruitfulness is pouring out of me

  • Recognizing that there is now an anointing on my words

  • The two works that seem to occur in the life of all believers

WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! Part 5 is NOT suitable for children to hear. It contains testimony regarding sexual issues, including masturbation, which may even be offensive for some believers to hear. If you are easily offended by this level of transparency, PLEASE DO NOT LISTEN to part 5. I share these recordings to help the thousands who have contacted me with painful struggles in these areas. Thank you, Michael

2019 Copyright Notice. While these recordings in the series “Trusting God in the Wilderness” may be downloaded for personal use on your own device, they are not to be copied, transmitted, edited, publicly played, shared, or uploaded to any website, social media platform, or content distribution systems such as YouTube. All other use of these recordings, without prior written permission, is strictly prohibited and all rights have been reserved by Michael Chriswell, owner of said recordings.

2012 July - Michael Journal Entries

Part 1

  • Realizing the need of intentionally walking in the fruits of the Spirit

  • Reflections and insights on what happened regarding my relationship with Jill

  • God teaching me to be still and be a son

Part 2

  • Lessons from my faith failure in divorce court

  • Battling my mom's unbelief and antagonism towards my faith

  • Learning to not take the advice of those around me, but to seek God’s counsel alone

  • Incredible guidance through an Oswald Chambers Devotional

  • Willing to allow myself to be wronged or cheated in order to trust God

  • Choosing to be a fool for Christ

  • Satan attacks me through my mom right after a great time in prayer on the mountain

  • Revelations about my suffering and comforts both of which come form the Holy Spirit

Part 3

  • Tempting thoughts to find pain relief with my ex-girlfriend

  • Participating in the sufferings of Christ, something no Old Covenant believer could do.

  • Realizing true justice comes in the next life, not this one

  • If I try to escape this pain, I will also escape the character

  • The Spirit shows me that my ex-wife is being used in my life like a Pharaoh

  • I'm all alone, there is no one who can help me now but God

  • Confusing happiness with joy

  • Knowing what it means to despair even of life

  • A Summary of my current sufferings

  • God's amazing providence confirming Matthew 5:39 over and over

  • Seeing LOTS of 555's that God will deliver me

  • Good message at church about righteous indignation and the feminizing of Jesus

  • Validation of my righteous indignation and passion towards the things that offend God

Part 4

  • Feeling anxiety about meeting a Christian business man

  • Asking God for wisdom because I'm too open to what other may want to do in my life

  • Receiving contradictory "Prophetic words from the Lord" from two different people

  • Confused about my work life/ministry life balance

  • Important revelations on God's Fatherhood

  • Father teaching me to "ask, seek, knock" continually and to depend upon Him fully in prayer

  • Brokenhearted after my meeting with a worldly entrepreneur who calls himself a Christian

  • A Summary of the divorce court story and injustices so far

  • The intense conflicts between my mother and I increase

  • Receiving a terrible blow of more false accusations and feeling like giving up on my faith in Christ

  • Tempted to find pain relief and just take a job

Part 5

  • The irony of someone wanting to interview me about my "success", not realizing I'm now a total "failure" in the eyes of the world

  • Trying to live in the New Covenant with the promises of the Old Covenant

  • Feeling like God has me in a vice, putting the squeeze on me

  • God testing me to see if I will deliver myself or stay put trusting in God alone

  • My physical body is weakened by all the suffering

  • Sensing Father is writing a wonderful story in my life that is not yet finished, hence why I haven't been ready to tell my story or make videos yet

  • Real transformation only comes through suffering, not teaching

  • Growing in discernment as I meet with professing business "believers"

  • Increasing pressure from others to "do something" and to stop waiting on God

  • The key principle for me in this season is to endure

  • A growing burden to begin sharing what I'm learning so far in my walk with God

  • Torn between two interpretations of my story, one of which makes NO sense to my flesh or my parents

  • Insights on why God is not allowing me to get a job

  • God answers my prayer to confirm I'm on the right path

2019 Copyright Notice. While these recordings in the series “Trusting God in the Wilderness” may be downloaded for personal use on your own device, they are not to be copied, transmitted, edited, publicly played, shared, or uploaded to any website, social media platform, or content distribution systems such as YouTube. All other use of these recordings, without prior written permission, is strictly prohibited and all rights have been reserved by Michael Chriswell, owner of said recordings.

2012 June - Michael Journal Entries

Part 1

My Garden of Gathsemene Experience of Deep Anguish

Part 2

  • In church we are taught it's about believing, not obeying

  • An aggravating "Catch 22" in the Christian faith

  • Christianity in the flesh is impossible

  • The Two Biggest Obstacles for Christians

  • Giving up the World is not enough

  • Trying to figure out what stage I'm at in my walk

  • Revelations about what it takes to be complete in Christ

  • Lessons learned from my relationship with my girlfriend

  • Revelations on what "Perfect Love Casts Out Fear" means

  • The Great Evil is our own Self Life

Part 3

  • God confirms my greatest need is to deny myself

  • Children on vacation with $100 illustration

  • After prayer for more suffering, it comes through my son telling me that a life long secret of mine has been revealed to him by my ex-wife

  • Pursuing Knowledge vs Faith

  • Why Psychology should have no place in the life of a Christ follower

  • Why the Scientific approach of proving God falls short

  • My mother struggles to understand the message of "giving myself up"

  • Modern day idolatry and a test you can use to see if something is an idol to you

  • Quenching and Grieving the Holy Spirit

Part 4

  • The seriousness of denial in the Christian's life

  • The importance of asking God to show you the dark spots in your heart

  • Insights on child-like faith vs pursuing knowledge

  • Sacrifice: Saint vs. Politician vs. Professional Athlete - What's the difference?

  • The need for discretion

  • Changing my behavior to make Christ more attractive

  • God shows me partial obedience is not obedience

  • Praying God not to bless my ex-wife until He's done using her to afflict me for the growth

  • Gratitude to God for the suffering that is uniquely mine

  • Mysterious absence of Satan in recent weeks

  • Another reason being a Christian is so hard

  • How important it is to be in the moment

Part 5

  • Revelations on making false meaning in our stories: Narrative Fallacy

  • Understanding the role fear has played in my relationships

  • Realizing my sufferings are killing SELF

  • Willing myself to learn to love selflessly

  • The motivation to give self up

  • Realizing that God's love is still not made complete in me

  • Realizing that I need to learn and intentionally obey Christ's teachings

  • Contrasting the world's ways with the ways of Godly men and women

  • Consciously realizing that every person I meet is an opportunity to represent the light of Jesus Christ

  • Thoughts on being "all things to all people"

  • Serving others is serving Christ

  • The gap between what we hear in Christian music and our daily reality

  • Being consciously aware of the two natures in you

  • My character flaws show so vividly when compared to this movie scene

Part 6

  • A practice message to others about my passion about discipleship

  • Engaging spiritual warfare with specific Scriptures

  • God shows me that I've gone to an extreme thinking that all my problems with my girlfriend are my selfishness, when in fact she is lacking discretion in some key ways.

  • Lesson from Dog eating my three day old Oakley Sunglasses

  • Ups and Downs of the Christian life

2019 Copyright Notice. While these recordings in the series “Trusting God in the Wilderness” may be downloaded for personal use on your own device, they are not to be copied, transmitted, edited, publicly played, shared, or uploaded to any website, social media platform, or content distribution systems such as YouTube. All other use of these recordings, without prior written permission, is strictly prohibited and all rights have been reserved by Michael Chriswell, owner of said recordings.

2012 May - Michael Journal Entries

Part 1

  • Most Christians choose the safe path and miss the rewards.

  • What running the narrow path requires

  • The necessity of experiential faith

  • More insights on why we need discipleship and not counseling

  • Anxiety from having to attend a business conference

  • Learning to Trust God entirely for the Results in your life

  • Struggling to start teaching, while I'm still learning so much

  • I took the long way to fullness in Christ, but you don't have to

  • My commitment to get back to the simplicity of our faith

  • The saint must walk alone

  • Confirmation on Who I am to serve with my discipleship program

Part 2

  • Admitting and fighting against my evil selfishness

  • My Biblical response to my sin

  • Fighting the temptation to manipulate someone else to meet my needs

  • The simple answer is to give myself up

  • Feeling such a strong burden to call people out on their half-hearted Christianity

  • Facing the consequences of my pre-marital sex and disobedience

  • The gripping fear of giving myself up, and not having my needs met

2019 Copyright Notice. While these recordings in the series “Trusting God in the Wilderness” may be downloaded for personal use on your own device, they are not to be copied, transmitted, edited, publicly played, shared, or uploaded to any website, social media platform, or content distribution systems such as YouTube. All other use of these recordings, without prior written permission, is strictly prohibited and all rights have been reserved by Michael Chriswell, owner of said recordings.

2012 April - Michael Journal Entries

Part 1

  • Feeling a deep call to turn people from Idolatry

  • The rise of Spiritual incompatibility between my girlfriend and I

  • God is changing my thinking to what people would call "Radical"

  • A hypothetical trip to heaven to hear what Father would say about your love towards Him.

  • The need to ask for the Holy Spirit

  • The desire to go to men, rather than God

  • Going back to the simply teachings of Christ and believing Him to change you

Part 2

  • The Revelation of the Flesh being irretrievably broken

  • Walk by the Spirit, instead of trying to fix the flesh

  • Solving the confusion of Romans 7

  • More Revelation about Counseling vs Discipleship

Part 3

  • God testing me in the area of finances

  • Satan uses old client to tempt me back into marketplace

  • Revelations on modern day idolatry

  • Asking ourselves honestly how much do we truly love God

  • Insights on truly knowing God

  • Parental alienation kicks into high gear

Part 4

  • Insights while watching Oprah Winfrey and T.D. Jakes Life Class on TV

  • My prayer and confession of sexual sin to God, asking for forgiveness

  • Many new insights about Spiritual Warfare which came from a year of intense spiritual warfare.

  • Increased spiritual attack while reading the book, Kingdom of the Occult

  • Recognizing the childhood root of all my insecurity

2019 Copyright Notice. While these recordings in the series “Trusting God in the Wilderness” may be downloaded for personal use on your own device, they are not to be copied, transmitted, edited, publicly played, shared, or uploaded to any website, social media platform, or content distribution systems such as YouTube. All other use of these recordings, without prior written permission, is strictly prohibited and all rights have been reserved by Michael Chriswell, owner of said recordings.

2012 March - Michael Journal Entries

Part 1

  • God reveals His Jealousy through my own and He is giving me an experiential faith.

  • 3/24 - Seeing 666 6 Times in 7 to 8 hours. Satan beginning to bring opposition to my discipleship training program.

  • It is God's mercy that we are not promoted before we are ready.

  • A. W. Tozer Insights and Revelations about true and false believers

  • How God is teaching me by the Holy Spirit and then confirming things by the words of Godly men.

  • Without Obedience we will never know the Presence and Power of God

  • Christians have a love affair with the world and then wonder why they don't have fullness in Christ.

  • My prayer for God to turn men from the world and to Himself.

Part 2

  • The need to intentionally train ourselves to become Godly

  • This recording captures the early inspirations of what would eventually become the John 7:17 Challenge

  • We talk about God as if he is a subject, not a person, as if He was a "dead author"

  • I've learned more about my personal relationship with God outside the "church" than inside

  • Do you love the Lord? How do you know? What is your evidence?

  • Planning ideas about the discipleship program

2019 Copyright Notice. While these recordings in the series “Trusting God in the Wilderness” may be downloaded for personal use on your own device, they are not to be copied, transmitted, edited, publicly played, shared, or uploaded to any website, social media platform, or content distribution systems such as YouTube. All other use of these recordings, without prior written permission, is strictly prohibited and all rights have been reserved by Michael Chriswell, owner of said recordings.