Am I experiencing any mental torment which could be coming from my willful unforgiveness?
21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" 22 Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. 23 "Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24 As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. 25 Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. 26 "The servant fell on his knees before him. 'Be patient with me,' he begged, 'and I will pay back everything.' 27 The servant's master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. 28 "But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him. 'Pay back what you owe me!' he demanded. 29 "His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, 'Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.' 30 "But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 31 When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened. 32 "Then the master called the servant in. 'You wicked servant,' he said, 'I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33 Shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?' 34 In anger his master turned him over to the jailers [KJV – Tormentors] to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. 35 "This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother sincerely and from your heart."
INSIGHT: Imagine this; you’re a Christian, but the thoughts coming into your head are almost always worrisome, anxious, confusing, and fearful. You’re desperate for peace and God doesn’t seem to be helping you, so you start running to food, drugs, alcohol, music, porn, exercise, or recreation for temporary relief. You have no idea that God is allowing you to be tormented in your thoughts, by evil spirits, because you are withholding forgiveness. In his mercy, He is trying to make you miserable enough to turn you from your disobedience before it is too late. The torment will stop as soon as you forgive, but do not delay. God may turn you over to your stubborn heart and allow you to remain trapped in your hard heart (Psalm 81:11-12). Note: King Saul was tormented by evil spirits sent from God, after he disobeyed God.
While I was living in my friend’s office, God set up a beautiful encounter between me and the cleaning lady named Kay. We had a brief chat and I discerned something was wrong in her heart. After I inquired about it, God gave her the grace to admit that she was struggling with terrible unforgiveness against her sisters. They had committed some terrible wrongs against Kay, regarding their mother’s death and will. Kay was a believer in Christ, but she was filled with hate towards her sisters. She had heaviness in her heart, and she was afraid of dying in her unforgiveness, but she didn’t know how to get rid of it. I told her about today’s teaching and that she can get rid of it by letting them go, from her heart, before the Lord. I grabbed her shaking hands and began to lead her in a prayer of forgiving them. She began shaking even harder and crying. It was like watching an emotional volcano erupt in her heart. The forces of good and evil were battling for her heart, and evil was about to lose. She came up from the prayer, took a huge breath, and exclaimed, “I’m free Michael…I’m free!” In a testimonial video she says, “If you can get the same feeling I have now…what are you waiting for? What happened is in the past; forgiveness is your future”. – Kay Duncan