DAY 09 - Humbly Trusting God Like a Child

Am I humbly trusting and depending on God like children depend on their parents?

1 At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” 2He called a little child and had him stand among them. 3And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.  4Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. - Matthew 18:1-4

INSIGHT:  Pride, the opposite of humility, has been the biggest giant I have ever faced.  I have battled it for many years of my adult life.  In early 2010, eager to win against this giant, I began asking the Lord to give me insight into the root of man’s problems.  Many pastors had taught that the root problem is selfishness, but I said, “Lord that still seems like an effect to me; so what is the cause below that?” 

All of a sudden, the births of all five of my children began playing in my mind.  I was seeing again what happened when their umbilical cords were cut and the children were separated from their mother.  They all screamed in frightful panic.  It was like they were all of a sudden subconsciously screaming out, “Who is going to take care of me now…who is going to keep me warm…who is going to protect me …who is going to feed me… who will love me now?  Their fear and screaming was not coming from selfishness; it was coming from deep insecurity, which resulted from being cut off from the only life source they had ever known.  Then my mind flashed back to the Garden of Eden, where God helped me to see that the sin of Adam and Eve effectively cut us all off from our original purpose and life source.  Essentially, our spiritual umbilical cords have all been cut.  The result is a deep insecurity, which aches in all of us from the sin that separated us from our Father.  We too grow up subconsciously screaming, “Who will love me and accept me?”  Until we experience Christ up close and personal, this screaming continues even for “Christians”.

When my twins Ashley and Kaley were born, they were placed in separate incubator beds for examination.  They were premature and nurses were everywhere, so I couldn’t be right with them the whole time.  Ashley, the oldest, started screaming hysterically.  I tried talking to her from across the room to calm her down, but it didn’t work.  Her desperate shrieks continued and they finally invited me over to her.  With video camera in hand, I walked over to a beet red face and ear piercing cries of panic.  I put my face very close to her and told her that Daddy was there now and that it was all ok.  She turned, looked right into my eyes, and the screaming instantly stopped.  She had heard my voice in the room, but now she was experiencing my presence up close.  It not only brought comfort to her, but it brought great pleasure and honor to me to see her look to me for her security.  Now I know why God delights in our humility, and why He despises our pride.  As grownups, our default vice for finding love and acceptance seems to be pride, until we are reconciled to God by the power of the Spirit. 

I heard a pastor say that pride is when I compare my strengths against your weakness, in an effort to elevate my value over yours.  Until our identity is formed in Christ, we strive to create our own value, by elevating ourselves above others.  I did this for years, because I was so insecure.  It seemed to work temporarily because I found some love and acceptance, but it was inauthentic, and in God’s eyes it was evil.  Why?  He created us to find our love and value in Him, not apart from Him. 

Humility, the place of entire dependence on God, is, from the very nature of things, the first duty and highest virtue of man.
— Andrew Murray

Humility was the major key to me finding deep security and joy in Christ.  When He looks down from heaven, does He see you being humbly dependent, or self-sufficient like I was for so long?